Fighting w Pheromones

[LadyVictoria]

I've noticed that every time I wear any pheromones I fight with my bf. I wore Sexology once and he said I smelled like herbs, which I think I did it was a sweet pungent smell tinged with morning sickness feeling

Anyhow- with Dulce we fought, with IF we fought, then yesterday I wore PP to work and after went to go see him and we fought again. I thought that by then the PP would have worn off but maybe when I reapplied another scent it picked it back up again, anyhow we fought and I got so mad I left.

Has this happened to anyone else?

I'm thinking of wearing Garland because it has EST and since I am new to pheromones I read up on it last night and thought maybe he will respond better to EST. I'll see him tomorrow when he drops off our son

Maybe I'll just throw a grenade at him instead.

 

Okay so I'm obsessed with LPMP I was up until almost 4am reading threads on pheros and adding stuff to my cart..

[Calii]

Do you fight a lot without mones ? ...the only thing I can think of is that he is put off by a change in how he always "sees" you <?> if that makes sense.Perhaps he is uncomfortable/threatened by changes,especially if you are behaving differently...someone with more experience will be along to give other thoughts

[bumbob]

Perhaps he is uncomfortable/threatened by changes,especially if you are behaving differently..

 

May be you can try go off Pheros for a week to see any difference????

[LadyVictoria]

Do you fight a lot without mones ? ...the only thing I can think of is that he is put off by a change in how he always "sees" you <?> if that makes sense.Perhaps he is uncomfortable/threatened by changes,especially if you are behaving differently...someone with more experience will be along to give other thoughts

 

IDK ~ he was upset because he thought I was showing to much cleavage which I wasn't because I was wearing a 70s peasant top and he is taller than I am so he was looking down at me~ the crazy thing is I've worn this particular blouse before and he loved it, so Im thinking it has to be the pheromones, in any case I called him a crazy narcissistic bastard, that denying me artistic freedom and creativity because dress is a form of art and that he was imposing on my artistic integrity~ blah blah blah - I was a real bitch, but I have PMS so I don't care. I don't even think I understood what I was saying I was so EMO

 

Maybe he thought I looked to sexy and it made him mad? perhaps that was his ' view ' of me.

[LadyVictoria]

May be you can try go off Pheros for a week to see any difference????

 

I don't wear them often. I did notice with Dulce we argued a bit last Friday but then made up and I didn't wear anything w/ pheros and we were both in that ga ga lovey dovey frame of mind all weekend. So I'm thinking maybe I need to go light on pheros as perhaps my body already produces them on their own.

 

My manager before bosshole would always have pep talks with me, he still does, part of these talks center around what he says is my capacity to elevate the moods of people around me, so if I am having a good day the productivity increases and people are happy and laughing, but if I have a bad or off week, he notices people curse, are agitated and there is hostility in the air, he says I am a natural mood elevator to those around me~ He moved my desk towards the back of the department in the middle of everyone because I have a loud voice, he said if I laugh it carries and people can hear and respond better at work.

Bosshole has noticed this too and incorporated it into my review this year, this mood elevating quality I posses like some mutant freak from X-men

 

I never really understood what they meant and thought maybe they had that talk with everyone, or maybe they think I'm crazy and will come to work with an AK 47

 

Is this possible? Maybe even a little extra pheromones sends my bf over the edge

I did wear a bit of PP to work and WOW it was like a freakin musical at work

[Beccah]

Maybe pheromones+pms= overkill

 

It's scientifically proven that not only do men perceive us as being more attractive when we're ovulating, but that we're actually more physically attractive at this stage in our cycles. So my theory is extra 'attracting' pheromones + the spike in his testosterone in response to your naturally elevated copulin levels created a 'roid rage' effect in him, and you also overstimulated your brain while it's flooded excess hormones due to the monthly beast.

[bumbob]

he says I am a natural mood elevator to those around me~I did wear a bit of PP to work and WOW it was like a freakin musical at work

Is this possible? Maybe even a little extra pheromones sends my bf over the edge

 

WOW! Thatz really cool! You are a walking mood elevator! Even your boss notice this! That's quite something! :)

 

I remember wearing weapon X with MO one day and it was horrible! We had arguments, i was moody... etc And what i realised is that there are some pheros that are better used privately EG: BEDROOM than actually wearing them in public... Also, MO gets quite upset when I'm a bit "snappy"/ arguementative? So it could be PMS? Does he know that you are having PMS?

[LadyVictoria]

Maybe pheromones+pms= overkill

 

It's scientifically proven that not only do men perceive us as being more attractive when we're ovulating, but that we're actually more physically attractive at this stage in our cycles. So my theory is extra 'attracting' pheromones + the spike in his testosterone in response to your naturally elevated copulin levels created a 'roid rage' effect in him, and you also overstimulated your brain while it's flooded excess hormones due to the monthly beast.

 

 

Oh yes that makes sense, I do have PMS, I ate two tamale, 4 chicken wings and 2 Reeses's Butter Cups for breakfast. Now I want to spend money that I shouldn't spend. Yeah Beccah you are right because I remember when we lived together at certain times during the month we would have sex before going to sleep then he would wake me up an hour later and we would get it on again! The chemistry is insane.

[LadyVictoria]

WOW! Thatz really cool! You are a walking mood elevator! Even your boss notice this! That's quite something! :)

 

I remember wearing weapon X with MO one day and it was horrible! We had arguments, i was moody... etc And what i realised is that there are some pheros that are better used privately EG: BEDROOM than actually wearing them in public... Also, MO gets quite upset when I'm a bit "snappy"/ arguementative? So it could be PMS? Does he know that you are having PMS?

 

You know I never even thought about what he's been saying, but the more I think about it okay maybe I do have an excess amount, maybe that's why I sit by management because I have to be a controlled substance.

Yesterday with PP I noticed there was a cabaret at my desk. Even the resident curmudgeon that sits in front of me was cracking jokes. He doesn't know I have PMS. Im sure he could tell last night because I was CRAY CRAY

 

Do you think Cuddle Bunny would work better on him to help him ease up ?

[bumbob]

Do you think Cuddle Bunny would work better on him to help him ease up ?

 

Possibly MO is very cuddly when i have CB on I only needed a DOT on my neck and he was very cuddly when he sniffed it on my neck so rmb just a little bit goes a loooooonnngggggg way! Hope you will have a better week next week!!!!

[Potion Master]

I'm on Beccah's side with this one.

 

It sounds like he is threatened by how over-the-top attractive he perceives you to be with the added pheros. It's too much. You become something that he fears he will not be able to control, so he slaps you down and tries to conquer you again. It's not acceptable behavior in my book, but I've seen it before and I understand it, though I doubt HE understands what he is really doing. He is just REACTING. And he is wired to react in a conquering fashion.

 

As far as wearing pheros, LACE (Est plus Alpha-Nol) might have the most positive effect on him.

 

 

Not to offend - this may not be your guy at all, but in general, there is a "type" that exhibits this kind of behavior. The "type" is excessively "macho" and see's women as possessions...as positive reflections of themselves. They want you to look beautiful, but they don't want you to stray too far from their side, or show any individuality or independence...god forbid you embarrass them. Doing so, creates a rage in the man where they are compelled to suppress the individuality and independence of the female. This can escalate to violence, or verbal abuse to the point where the woman feels useless UNLESS she has the approval of the man. Many times this is an insidious process...it can take a long time for a woman to lose all sense of her self worth. And usually, the rewards for "good behavior" are so wonderful, that the woman chases them like an addict. Adoration, fabulous passionate sex, etc. Beware the punishment and reward scenarios, and if the man tries to separate you from your support system, your friends, family, loved ones, that's it. Run for the hills. As soon as the "I don't like your friends" speech happens, get the hell out. The most important step in having total control over a person is giving them no place else to go.

[Dolly]

Not to offend - this may not be your guy at all, but in general, there is a "type" that exhibits this kind of behavior. The "type" is excessively "macho" and see's women as possessions...as positive reflections of themselves. They want you to look beautiful, but they don't want you to stray too far from their side, or show any individuality or independence...god forbid you embarrass them. Doing so, creates a rage in the man where they are compelled to suppress the individuality and independence of the female. This can escalate to violence, or verbal abuse to the point where the woman feels useless UNLESS she has the approval of the man. Many times this is an insidious process...it can take a long time for a woman to lose all sense of her self worth. And usually, the rewards for "good behavior" are so wonderful, that the woman chases them like an addict. Adoration, fabulous passionate sex, etc. Beware the punishment and reward scenarios, and if the man tries to separate you from your support system, your friends, family, loved ones, that's it. Run for the hills. As soon as the "I don't like your friends" speech happens, get the hell out. The most important step in having total control over a person is giving them no place else to go.

 

 

Been there, done that, got the T-shirt and the matching hat!

 

Exactly what Mara said.....be aware of those signals. If they start mounting, run like hell.....

[luna65]

I will say that depending on the situation and the chemistry, pheromones can definitely underscore insecurities, which is why I am careful about the ones I use around Quince. My goal is to make him feel good, to make him feel secure and relaxed, because it is fufilling for me in turn. I only bring out the big guns, sexually, when we know it's playtime. For me to wear an aggressively sexual blend for socialization or just out in public would make him uncomfortable (or even for him to wear himself). I am very cognizant of what affects his mood and how, and plan accordingly.

[LadyVictoria]

I'm on Beccah's side with this one.

 

It sounds like he is threatened by how over-the-top attractive he perceives you to be with the added pheros. It's too much. You become something that he fears he will not be able to control, so he slaps you down and tries to conquer you again. It's not acceptable behavior in my book, but I've seen it before and I understand it, though I doubt HE understands what he is really doing. He is just REACTING. And he is wired to react in a conquering fashion.

 

As far as wearing pheros, LACE (Est plus Alpha-Nol) might have the most positive effect on him.

 

 

Not to offend - this may not be your guy at all, but in general, there is a "type" that exhibits this kind of behavior. The "type" is excessively "macho" and see's women as possessions...as positive reflections of themselves. They want you to look beautiful, but they don't want you to stray too far from their side, or show any individuality or independence...god forbid you embarrass them. Doing so, creates a rage in the man where they are compelled to suppress the individuality and independence of the female. This can escalate to violence, or verbal abuse to the point where the woman feels useless UNLESS she has the approval of the man. Many times this is an insidious process...it can take a long time for a woman to lose all sense of her self worth. And usually, the rewards for "good behavior" are so wonderful, that the woman chases them like an addict. Adoration, fabulous passionate sex, etc. Beware the punishment and reward scenarios, and if the man tries to separate you from your support system, your friends, family, loved ones, that's it. Run for the hills. As soon as the "I don't like your friends" speech happens, get the hell out. The most important step in having total control over a person is giving them no place else to go.

 

Ugh I hate macho men, I was already a trophy once... he wouldn't keep me from my support system, he never has, we get along great and have fun together, he's never raised his voice or hand at me, part of the argument was it triggered something for me as well~ I think if he would have expressed himself in a softer way then I would have laughed it off and giving him a big hug~ it was the delivery that drove me mad, because its a trigger for me when someone just says something point blank, my mother is this way and it drives me up a wall- and my ex husband was this way too and this would drive me insane, because I believe there is a certain way of saying things to people in order to get a desired outcome without hurting the person's feeling. I am super sensitive to feelings mine as well as others so it was the tone in which he said it and his expression that made me go insane.

My ex would not let me sleep in on the weekends, then we would have a list of chores to do, it included a lot of cleaning. He was constantly ' showing ' me how to do things the right way, maybe I just attract this type of man because I have mother issues- WOW look at that full circle.

 

Thank you for the advice I will keep my eyes open. I just wish I could have a part time boyfriend, for going to the movies and sex. I like being alone because I need time for me. I like my independence, I want him to be an escort and only share opinions when necessary. Is there a phero for that? ; )

[LadyVictoria]

I will say that depending on the situation and the chemistry, pheromones can definitely underscore insecurities, which is why I am careful about the ones I use around Quince. My goal is to make him feel good, to make him feel secure and relaxed, because it is fufilling for me in turn. I only bring out the big guns, sexually, when we know it's playtime. For me to wear an aggressively sexual blend for socialization or just out in public would make him uncomfortable (or even for him to wear himself). I am very cognizant of what affects his mood and how, and plan accordingly.

 

This makes sense also. I don't think he liked PP ~ but I think Cuddle Bunny will be good.

[luna65]

I just wish I could have a part time boyfriend, for going to the movies and sex. I like being alone because I need time for me. I like my independence, I want him to be an escort and only share opinions when necessary. Is there a phero for that? ; )

 

Well see, that's what fuckbuddies are for, when you don't want an actual relationship, because relationships aren't easy. I wouldn't trade mine for the world, but some days I just have to say to the Universe, "Could you cut me a break here, please?" and then there's silence...which isn't really silence, it's the refrain of, "Hey, you're the one who wanted him, you know."

[Dolly]

I like being alone because I need time for me. I like my independence, I want him to be an escort and only share opinions when necessary. Is there a phero for that? ; )

 

 

Oh, I know what you mean......I truly value my "alone time".....my second husband wanted to be velcro-ed to me 24/7, and that chaps my behind.....I expressed this to my current love very early on in our relationship, and he "gets it"......he isn't upset or offended at all by my need to occasionally be by myself to decompress, as it were......

 

There are men out there who understand.......

[Rosegirl]

Thank you for the advice I will keep my eyes open. I just wish I could have a part time boyfriend, for going to the movies and sex. I like being alone because I need time for me. I like my independence, I want him to be an escort and only share opinions when necessary. Is there a phero for that? ; )

 

LadyVictoria, it could be the pheros, and maybe you should try different ones other than what you have been using. However, I would have an honest discussion with him about how, if he needs to "critique" you or what you are wearing, to do it a little more gently and with more respect.

 

I personally don't think there is anything wrong with talking to him about having a little more time to yourself. If he is a really good guy, he will try to understand. I'm not suggesting that you change it from a relationship to a f**kbuddy, but if you need more time alone, just tell him. It may even help your relationship. But you will have to be careful about how you deliver the request.

[LadyVictoria]

Well see, that's what fuckbuddies are for, when you don't want an actual relationship, because relationships aren't easy. I wouldn't trade mine for the world, but some days I just have to say to the Universe, "Could you cut me a break here, please?" and then there's silence...which isn't really silence, it's the refrain of, "Hey, you're the one who wanted him, you know."

 

Totally because I did want him~ and I got him.

[Potion Master]

Personal Space is one of the reasons I really love the long-distance relationship I have been in for the past three years. Every visit is a honeymoon and our time together is cherished. I am the type that gets pretty crabby if I always have someone hovering. Fortunately, my guy feels much the same way about it as I do so it works for us.

[LadyVictoria]

Oh, I know what you mean......I truly value my "alone time".....my second husband wanted to be velcro-ed to me 24/7, and that chaps my behind.....I expressed this to my current love very early on in our relationship, and he "gets it"......he isn't upset or offended at all by my need to occasionally be by myself to decompress, as it were......

 

There are men out there who understand.......

 

My ex husband felt the need to always report to his mom and dad and sisters on everything. We were always with his family, I don't mind spending time with family, but when his mom calls at dinnertime and says she was picking up takeout for her husband and did he want anything for dinner.... it was a little to close for comfort and ended up being part of the demise of our marriage.

 

I was like.. " did she ask you if you wanted a bj with those fries? "

[luna65]

Personal Space is one of the reasons I really love the long-distance relationship I have been in for the past three years. Every visit is a honeymoon and our time together is cherished. I am the type that gets pretty crabby if I always have someone hovering. Fortunately, my guy feels much the same way about it as I do so it works for us.

 

Yep, that's exactly how I feel (well of course I do, Twin )...I keep teasing Q that even if we did end up living together it wouldn't be in the same house. :banana055:

Edited April 3, 2011 by luna65

[LadyVictoria]

LadyVictoria, it could be the pheros, and maybe you should try different ones other than what you have been using. However, I would have an honest discussion with him about how, if he needs to "critique" you or what you are wearing, to do it a little more gently and with more respect.

 

I personally don't think there is anything wrong with talking to him about having a little more time to yourself. If he is a really good guy, he will try to understand. I'm not suggesting that you change it from a relationship to a f**kbuddy, but if you need more time alone, just tell him. It may even help your relationship. But you will have to be careful about how you deliver the request.

:banana055:

 

Word! I need alone time right now I have bad cramps and want to watch cheesy rom coms

BTW Love Potion no. 9 was on today, I watched it for the zillionth time

[bumbob]

Personal Space is one of the reasons I really love the long-distance relationship I have been in for the past three years. Every visit is a honeymoon and our time together is cherished. I am the type that gets pretty crabby if I always have someone hovering. Fortunately, my guy feels much the same way about it as I do so it works for us.

 

OH! I'm exactly in that situation right now! And yes, I'm the kind of person who needs a LOT of space MO and I are doing well in our relationship right now :) Living too close can cause too little self time... we nearly broke up because of not enough space! :banana055: Everyone gotta BREATH sometimes! I'm actually ok with long distance relationship Enjoying the freedom so far!

[JOC]

My guess is that you've become too sexy for him to handle when you use the sexual pheros. As the ladies said, have a chat with him.

 

One of my ex bf was very possessive. No spaghetti tops, it has to be a proper tee or top. He would question me on every guy he saw me chatting with. Obviously the relationship didn't last. I didn't need my bf to behave like a mother.

[LadyVictoria]

Wow you guys! Wore Garland which has LACE and EST- saw bf today for 10 seconds- starts texting me being sweet and apologetic. HOLY MOLY

LPMP is zeeee best no joke I love all you strong beautiful informative mujeres!

[Aida]

Lady Victoria ,

I am new to the world of pheromones as well , but troll the message boards like an addict every night trying to learn all I can. Your post actually gives me something I can contribute to!

I think my intended target and your boyfriend must be of similar makeups (chemical? psychological?) , because while I have gotten fantastic results and mega hits with everything I have tried from LP from the population at large , with him it has been more miss than hits , pardon the phero-pun! I tried continued use of several hoping he just needed to get used to a new phero-signature from me , but some were so bad in terms of our interactions , I had to stop.

My target is attractive , middle aged , has a position of authority/high stress , prone to depression , quick to anger , periodically insecure , can be social but prefers to withdraw , highly independent , lots of testosterone , not a talker. If I took a corny "what kind of man is your man" survey in a magazine, he would fall into "dark and brooding". The Bronte sisters could narrate our time together. Even pre-LPMP , it was up and down. The highs are euphoric and the lows are like being run over by a truck.

 

Cougar : Super insecure /Angry / He picked fights

Popularity Potion : Angry / Withdrawn

SS4W : Angry / Withdrawn

Leather : Angry but turned on (not my thing!)

Cuddle bunny : Caring but hypersexed (still not what I was looking for)

A-nol : Excellent mood , super chatty , but completely non-sexual .....but periodically asked me if I was on drugs - it was Woozy Floozy , so I had "perma-smile" and was happier than usual too. I actually used that bottle up on nothing but my interactions with him. I could take him from raging anger , to chatty happy in minutes. We interact at work and it was very helpful.

EST : From everything I read on the boards and everything I knew about him , I thought - this is the one! This must be the answer. While I am still testing it , I have seen no visible results , neither positive or negative with straight EST.

 

A few days ago , my miracle in a bottle came in the form of Girly Twirly. Now , I too have Garland and Lace V3 , but my skin amps cinnamon/spice so awfully (I can not wear any of the "Love Potions" either unfortunately) I could never wear it around him. So Saturday was the maiden voyage of Lace plus Cops.......ding , ding , ding!!!!! We have a winner. He was all smiles , lots of chatting , generous dose of flirting , and downright cuddly. It was everything I want in a "daily interaction" mix. Not too sexual , but not too platonic. Just fun , and just RIGHT. I hope you and I both have continued good results with LACE!

[LadyVictoria]

Lady Victoria ,

I am new to the world of pheromones as well , but troll the message boards like an addict every night trying to learn all I can. Your post actually gives me something I can contribute to!

I think my intended target and your boyfriend must be of similar makeups (chemical? psychological?) , because while I have gotten fantastic results and mega hits with everything I have tried from LP from the population at large , with him it has been more miss than hits , pardon the phero-pun! I tried continued use of several hoping he just needed to get used to a new phero-signature from me , but some were so bad in terms of our interactions , I had to stop.

My target is attractive , middle aged , has a position of authority/high stress , prone to depression , quick to anger , periodically insecure , can be social but prefers to withdraw , highly independent , lots of testosterone , not a talker. If I took a corny "what kind of man is your man" survey in a magazine, he would fall into "dark and brooding". The Bronte sisters could narrate our time together. Even pre-LPMP , it was up and down. The highs are euphoric and the lows are like being run over by a truck.

 

Cougar : Super insecure /Angry / He picked fights

Popularity Potion : Angry / Withdrawn

SS4W : Angry / Withdrawn

Leather : Angry but turned on (not my thing!)

Cuddle bunny : Caring but hypersexed (still not what I was looking for)

A-nol : Excellent mood , super chatty , but completely non-sexual .....but periodically asked me if I was on drugs - it was Woozy Floozy , so I had "perma-smile" and was happier than usual too. I actually used that bottle up on nothing but my interactions with him. I could take him from raging anger , to chatty happy in minutes. We interact at work and it was very helpful.

EST : From everything I read on the boards and everything I knew about him , I thought - this is the one! This must be the answer. While I am still testing it , I have seen no visible results , neither positive or negative with straight EST.

 

A few days ago , my miracle in a bottle came in the form of Girly Twirly. Now , I too have Garland and Lace V3 , but my skin amps cinnamon/spice so awfully (I can not wear any of the "Love Potions" either unfortunately) I could never wear it around him. So Saturday was the maiden voyage of Lace plus Cops.......ding , ding , ding!!!!! We have a winner. He was all smiles , lots of chatting , generous dose of flirting , and downright cuddly. It was everything I want in a "daily interaction" mix. Not too sexual , but not too platonic. Just fun , and just RIGHT. I hope you and I both have continued good results with LACE!

 

Hi Aida- I love Garland!

I'm going to try Super Sexy today and see how it goes. I would describe my bf as a.. Gemini

No offense to any Gems, I think you are all creative, intelligent and damn you all look good!