tyvey

"I do badly enough with one woman, why would I want two?"

ROFLMAO!!! If only more men were this wise.

This is JMO and may sound kind of harsh since I am obviously biased in your favor, not his but reading between the lines, I have a feeling what you really need and want is to HAVE A VOICE in this situation, and to have AGENCY, the right and courage to

(1) want what YOU want out of the relationship

(2) EXPRESS that

(3) and if he won't or can't give that to you, you are able & willing to move on.

I sound like 1990s Madonna I know. But she knew what she was talking about ) and it sounds like you need & want that, more than you specifically need to have or ramp-up the DIHL / urgent sexual response. You'll get enough of that from the cops, and your whole POINT is that you already have plenty of attraction from him, now you want to be HEARD about what you want, which is taking the relationship to the next level. If you felt you weren't getting that much DIHL last time, it might not have been because some phero(s) were "missing". It might have been purely that he was processing the new (really, the REAL) you and he was too busy doing THAT to address or express the DIHL stuff.

As for more a-nol ... I know I'm speaking as a person who still hasn't even tried it, lol, but from what I've read about it, I'm guessing there is plenty of a-nol in Leather and you probably don't need more. It doesn't sound like you're wanting or needing more bubbliness out of either of you.

So interesting: TAH and EST then seem like they can be a personality/mood detector!! At least for me I can use it as a test, LOL! Now that Rosebud mentions it, the one group of guys who were particularly jerky to me with the Me, Jane! were already clearly acting jerky from a distance in general, LOL - loud, competing for attention and social domination, shoving each other etc. (Opposite example, I was wearing MRF out last night and one of the guys there, who granted is a fairly thoughtful and polite guy, but I don't know very well, was especially sweet and attentive (a few minutes after I arrived and I just looked puzzled for a moment, he lunged across the table over people and actually said, almost frantically, "What's wrong? What's going on over there? What can I do? Whatever you need, just tell me, I'll do it, I'll give you whatever you need." And after he said it he had that classic dazed phero'd look on his face of "I don't understand why I just said that." ROFL!

I got a decant of this in trade and tried it yesterday. I admit to not looking it up first, and didn't know it had cops & TAH til coming here just now.

It figures about the TAH!! I was blown off, shoved past, and scowled at by guys all night, which happens to me *without fail* with beta-ish pheros. It's so weird. Must be the lack of congruency, or maybe w/my chemistry it makes me project an aura of weakness and "low value".

I didn't smell cops AT ALL at any point (vial, wet, dry) & was surprised to hear they're in there. So very good cover.

Scentwise, all I got, from minute one, was plasticky banana skin ate everything else. Sigh... To the trade post it goes.

Thanks so much for the advice y'all...very nice of you!! I will absolutely give Leather a try...maybe just not on this occasion And I basically live in OCCO so that's a given. THANKS again!!

ETA I only just saw your post Calii- so sweet, thank you- that's exactly what I need, some a-nol to make me feel chipper so I can BE myself I do adore C/E... so maybe I'll do that and a little TH in the hair

/threadjack!

Eek!! Thank you for being honest KrazyKat- that's exactly why I am a bit scared of it. I'm not going to take the chance at this point. I don't want to go in the BI direction- actually I want the opposite- maybe to become friends with him and THEN maybe go in the physical dirction if I decide I like him enough. thank you for the input.

Not sure this is right place to ask but didn't want to start an entire thread on the "general discussion" board just for my one little question/advice seeking that is specific to Leather...pls feel free to move...

Will be meeting up soon -- won't call it a date -- with a guy I don't know very well, who is not passive or weak, he's just "only" moderately sociable and less outgoing and alpha-ish than I am. I know he is a little in awe of me (not bragging, have been told so by several mutual friends who don't know each other) but does not seem actually *intimidated* by me, which I like. I am not 100% sure I am interested in pursuing a relationship with him, but I want HIM to want me, in case I decide I do... I know. I just want to feel confident and "myself" and not too self-conscious which I can tend to do when I am attracted to a guy and especially in this case where I am going to feel a little bit scrutinized and like he's going to go back and report everything I do and say to other people whose opinion I care about (this has happened before - always in a positive way, at least as far as I know LOL).

He has no problem being open with me, so I don't want or need to do anything too beta-ish, because that will just give ME blabbermouth, which I need like a hole in the head (in general and in this sitch).

So I think Leather is both the most congruent w/me and the most logical thing for my goal and this particular TG. BUT, I've never used Leather before and I'm a teeny bit scurred. Would love any suggestions/advice.

competing for a potential connection and competing for one which is already established are two different things and the latter is wholly degrading. Winning a man who possesses a divided heart is no victory.

 

..."we are no longer only friends. When you chose her over me and severed our friendship we became nothing at all."

So true and so well put.

How has no one reviewed this yet?? A bit late for you May but I am trying it today. It's *very* sweet, but in a fruity way, NOT in a sickly/fake/candy-sweet way. I don't get any floral out of it, just sweet sweet sweet ripe-to-bursting fruit. It is not huge or throwy. VERY light on me (but things disappear on me without musk or amber to hold them down so ymmv).

ETA it started out peach+pear, but over time it's become just a big juicy ripe peach that I keep catching light whiffs of. mmmm, peach.

I had Pink on last night and for the first time (that I noticed) it had this awesome bubblegum edge to it. Then went to strawberry. My favorite thing about these OCCOs though (besides their effect) is how light the cover scent is. (I don't know how it can cover the cops while being so light) It gives you so many options to layer with other stuff. I love the flexibility.

OMG, Dolly, as I read the OP the word LEATHER was in about 48-point font in my head! but I didn't want to assume LadyRose was a Leather kinda gal Great minds

If it were me I would not feel any obligation to keep the next date. He's forfeited his right to it. I do totally agree with Rosegirl that YOU have an equal right to act & decide that he does -- and again if it were me, his ass would already be out on the curb. JMO.

today:

Egg

Gothic Latte

Christine's Yin Ylang

Nekomusume

Jo Anna's SWC

Well cheeseburger, 8 months later I can report on my first trying of this that at least for me, I did not even realize there was chocolate in it at ALL, my skin ate it so fast. But then it always does that to chocolate, so maybe you shouldn't take my word.

Wet, it was marshmallow, butter, vanilla and musk. Then very quickly it became this oddly floral, dignified, super elegant thing: the vanilla (at least on me) is so unfoody that it smells FLORAL. A complex, nonheady white floral with musk rounded out, just touched really, with brown sugar but in a way that it again did not seem foody, just abstractly sweet. Unique and just intoxicating to me.

Yeah, I drank and not even that much and felt as though I'd drunk three times as much, I loved everyone so much.

THANK YOU for the fast delivery and extries in my most recent order. love, the broke Tyvey

Fantastic!! adding to list of things for next order Thank you.

Silky, with a metallic sheen. Sheerer than I expected. Should be worn to the opera, with elbow length gloves, a silk gown and pearls.

Sure!! I just put it in a pump-spray bottle with perfumer's alcohol (got mine in a huge bottle from Snowdrift). Too impatient to measure carefully, but I eyeball it to be about 2:1 (alcohol to perfume). Alcohol is probably not the greatest thing to do to one's hair, but I don't douse with it - a few sprays is more than enough (I have 3 sprays of Pillow Patter on now and it was too much, is making me dizzy) - and it doesn't seem to have affected my hair too much (texture/dryness etc).

I'm going to try to find some *scentless* hair serum or oil, and will try adding a bit of that to the spray so that it is more like a silkening mist, less drying and adds some shine and maybe calms flyaways. I know it will require vigorous shaking every time but I don't mind. If anyone can recommend such a product, I'd love it.

I also sometimes just mix LPs with my regular hair serum, BioSilk, which I luv. (BioSilk does have its own mild scent but it doesn't seem to interfere too badly with the scent.) I pour a tiny bit of each into hands (equal amounts, or maybe a little less BioSilk), rub together & smooth through hair. Obviously less drying for the hair than my alcohol spray. But for some reason the scent doesn't seem to last as long that way, maybe the BioSilk "eats" the perfume. Or maybe it's just that it throws less and that's why the scent is less noticeable to me.

Wet: cake, butter, red berry, some sweet lemon, and did I mention butter?: so intense it reminded me of movie theater popcorn butter. This struck me as the deeper, more intense, buttery, serious, older sister of Caught in the Act. But then of course within an hour my skin was all "Ack berry must convert to plastic, and must devour all other notes while we're at it". I'm totally converting it to a hair mist tho. Yummy yummy

Slathered this in my hair and on skin: drastically different. In the hair, it is warm and complex and feminine, powdery-perfumey in a good way, with a sizable throw; figgy and woody and very quiet on the skin.

My first H&S experience. I didn't notice effects on other people, but it made me love everyone (in a Vicodin way, though O HAI FDA H&S R NOT A DRUG), and gave me really bad blabbermouth!! Now I'm *definitely* not trying TC in public without duct-taping my mouth shut. Also (TMI alert) I think it was responsible for making me sort of err hot & bothered, in a situation where it was not really appropriate, LOL.

The need for luring ended within my first 2 days here.

Seriously thank you KrazyKat! Mwah!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LBG!

love it

on it

I still am naive enough to believe with every acquisition that it will quench my thirst for more, for an extended period. It's usually more like 24 hours (on a good day). I want to try Mark's Tonka Tabacum.