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Magnanimity

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Posts posted by Magnanimity

  1. 1 hour ago, Kayla said:

     

    I would agree with you saying something seems like it isn't quite right.  Are you sure that he's not married?  There seems to be a lot of conditions and time limits to how and when he can see you.  I would give yourself more value and tell him that you can see him when he has more quality time to spend with you - not when he may or may not have an hour to spare.  That's just me, though. If someone wants to spend time with you, they should make you a priority, not an afterthought. 

    Thanks for the thoughts and advice. Appreciate your gesture. I am exactly doing that and have made it clear to him in earlier conversations. I just got a text for another plan change, so i can see more during the day. I wont be going at all , if he wont make quality time and effort. 

     

    will keep ya all posted:), 

  2. 1 hour ago, raydee8_love said:

    ummmm NO NO NO - 

     

    good lady - don't let anyone rush you 

     

    yes !!! this was not on the docket  it's extra last time it was in one month and now it's

     

    is this a good plan for you?? 

     

    well he would be an idiot not to try - right?  relax in a hotel room - what with his trousers off?  giving you a massage??

    but you can tell him that you are glad that the 2 of you seem to have a really good connection and that it feels so good when you are connecting 

    you can also tell him that you want to get to know him better and you want him to learn what you are all about 

    tell him that a coffee date would be great and that you will be happy IF you both have the chance to see one another this time 

    if you can't meet this time, for what ever reason, let him know that are looking forward to meeting him again when his plans won't be dictated by his work meeting as you know his work is very important to him- right?

    Sure, Would do. All points noted. 

     

    1 hour ago, raydee8_love said:

     

    I still recommend taking your time not in an artificial way but just making sure everything is kosher with this guy 

    make sure you really like him, make sure you feel comfortable 

    you can tell him you feel an attraction towards him - be warm and open but let him know that you are not ready for a hotel room

    try to do active things as opposed to just sitting - like a gallery, walk in a cutesy area, visiting something of interest

    I suggested all that, gave him at least 5-6 such options and events in city. 

    1 hour ago, raydee8_love said:

    find out about him? why he chose his profession, why he likes (insert hobby) and let him know stuff about you what are your hobbies, interests, books you have read, movies..... future plans, best memories of elementary school  

    ask about his family ..... keep it positive 

    He reveled yesterday on phone, he doesn't want his family to know, at least not in near future as they wont understand his idea of relationship. he doesn't like to get married at all as it binds people, but know what a commitment is. Togetherness and companionship should always be a choice and not a compulsion to go back to same person. 

    1 hour ago, raydee8_love said:

    I don't know about Dom or leather  -  i don't have any experience with them  but seems to be a good mix and yes to B-nol 

     

    I got a text from him today morning to change plan again. he would be staying back with his sister now so can see me only for 1 hour or so. and now wants me to come to his side of work. I think i should refuse the meeting this time politely. I am not feeling comfortable with all this thousand times plan change and making me go by his ways. Big no.

    :) The plans should be mutually made not one persons feasibility, which i don't see happening here. 

  3. Some more updates from the day. 

    He called and exchanged messages to decided the stay and booking and how and where we meeting. After much planning, we found common 3 hour window where we can catch up. I observed he was changing plans and locations repeatedly, and if its not working out lets not meet. I said that's totally fine , maybe another time. i was nonchalant during conversation wherein i could sense little manipulation happening at his side. His planning meeting time, place, was changing as he was getting updates from office. I doubt that was the truth or maybe i am totally wrong. Then he asked me how i want to spent time. I gave outdoor options and places to dine. he said order in a hotel room so , its a place to sit and talk at ease. I refused politely , as i am not ready to get in that zone. He said fine , take your time but i had no intentions of any kind, but relaxation. I said maybe another time, and then lastly he changed his entire plan later in evening. he said he will back same day and not stay another day. not dine out , just coffee and will confirm if meeting at all or not. His meeting may extend, and if he get out within time, he will call me and i can rush to meet him. another possibility is his friends may catch him and he will not be able to come at all. :) I remain nonchalant, so he says, he will call me 1 hour before our decided time to confirm if he is coming or not. Last minute plans and change of plans all day long and last minute decision to call to confirm the date. Something seems not right :). before saying final bye for the day he said on text that he is not desperate or in hurry but is eager to take things forward with me. 

     

    Any thoughts?

     

    P.S - I will be editing the post soon as i have written things word to word which might not be healthy for me ;)

     

  4. Hi, 

     

    Some update. Through out this weekend this guy was on calls with me. Audio and video both. Kept on asking how you want to take things further. I took it easy and communicated same that how we feel is good but let things flow. He asked me when we plan to meet next. ( Last visit he said he will have a work related visit next month). I kept it vague by saying whenever your trip and we will see if possible for me to find time and meet. He said he plans to kiss me next time, that's how he feel and strongly feel, I may refuse if i am comfortable and he will respect it. ( shocker, how can someone declare that, such precise planning? or what it is? ) Now i got his call today morning ( another shocker) that he is visiting town tomorrow for work. He asked me my time . I confirmed to see him one day out of his two days trip. Tomorrow evening for coffee and dinner though i can meet both the days but i want to go little slow. 

    Now i need to plan my weapon options - 

    Leather (with cops

    Dom ( un with cops)

    some additional Bnol

    I plan this mix because i want him to see my strong side this time . I want to discourage his advances as he planning. 

    Pls suggest some combinations which may work well. (open to all suggestions)

    Thanks everyone :)

     

     

     

     

     

  5. 48 minutes ago, raydee8_love said:

     

     

     

    I am going to say this - I think you should wait beyond 2-3 conversations. I am not saying be dishonest or untruthful, just wait for a while longer. 

    My reasoning 1 - the economy is good, you could find something soon, then no need to say anything.

     Anticipating something. I thought similar, no need if i get something soon and then i wont matter at all. 

    48 minutes ago, raydee8_love said:

     

    2- do you give people you really don't know your financial report? - no - why is this any different - after all you could get a new situation in a few weeks.

    Exactly, even if i tell at a later stage, its understandable that it was too early to tell such things at that time. 

    48 minutes ago, raydee8_love said:

     

    3- in time if things are getting more friendly - NOT SEX - but moving closer then you can discuss this but don't be surprised if he wants to look at your resume and fix it all up.

    I cant say, he is in forces with any connectivity outside to help such a matter. If this happens i have no worry showing up my resume. i am good there.

    48 minutes ago, raydee8_love said:

     

    4 men who have been "burned" financially in connection with romance can be super antsy and sometimes keep a running tab in their minds

     

    5- just because he he feeling a high from the novelty doesn't mean it will keep on going- brains can only handle so much dopamine before they need a break - then well Reality 

     

    6.- wait for the sex see if there is real intimacy on his part - make sure he is decided that he is connected to you 

    Yesterday night on texts, he was again sharing his feelings. He says my mind says wait but my heart says hold you and just kiss you right away. I sleep and wake up thinking about you. As i am not there and have to wait till i meet you next and see what happens. I the feel is same i will surrender to the moment. He indicated that he might just grab me and kiss me next time we meet. He says his world has gone topsy turvy with his struggle between heart and mind.  Knowing himself he want to take some years to decide things but his heart wants to jump right away. I just heard him and said nothing.

     

    48 minutes ago, raydee8_love said:

     

    not trying to put a damper on anything .... i just have seen a similar situation from a far everything seemed like it was going good she was super gorgeous had a fantastic job, was funny and good and smart but he just could not make the real connection   and she wound up heart broken

    But I do know someone in another situation - and that one is a fairy tale, when they 1st meet she thought I am just going to get to know him and he can get to know me... he made THE most important connection of his with her and is happier than he was when he was a young guy..... now well it's better than Cinderella!!

     

    go slowly one step at a time

    He is a man i know he would want to rush things to intimacy and bed. i want to go slow and take sweet time to see how things progress. one thing he already mentioned is he wants committed relationship but doesn''t want to get married soon or ever at all. dread the legal thing. so i need to see what his definition of togetherness is in that case. 

     

    And thanks for all the help. It helped me clear up my mind about telling or not telling :)

    will keep you posted about the progress and other mone experiences as well.  

     

     

  6. Beside all the above, My side of story is , i am ENTP speaking. So you know how this story is like what it is. I am Virgo sun and Aries moon and ascendant both. 

    All these gives little insights, we all are way more complicated then MBTI tells us or sun signs describe us. I just know i am connecting with this man so looking forward to be with him. There are other aspects of my life which might affect us. I want to keep everything segregated so i take small steps and build everything back. . 

    I am struggling in my career. Its extremely tough and have to remove my debt and loans. The moment i saw the sale here in LP i connected with Mara because i so much need the magic in my life. and now i find it happening at least in relationship area. I so looking forward to have my mystery box and magic in my career and finances too. 

     

    @SnoopyaceThis is for you- I am between the jobs and not in best of financial position. I haven't told this man any of this so far. I am juggling between telling and not telling. telling now or at a later stage. Any thoughts? i am seeking answer within and outside. 

    I don't want to tell him fearing he might get me wrong and doubt my intentions. I have no goal to get financial support from him or anyone. I am self made and want to remain such. At the same time, i fear he will dislike it if he gets to know reality later. It will affect us later that i was not open enough and didn't trust him enough all along. I made it very clear to him, in initial 2 -3 conversations that i want a man in life not because i need him to do things for me because I WANT a companion to do things together. I am capable enough to suffice my needs. and at that he said it might be a problem for us , cos where and how will he BE in my life then? what will he do and where and how would i want him?  But he added he will handle it. and i need to be open and give him space in my life. He simply said - "Be open and let me in". So that what i tried to do when we met and hence the selection of mones . so i went with open and accepting vibe.

     

    All of you who are interested in this story so far, may want to answer and help me with my choice. Would be great to know what you think i should do ? Looking forward to more support here.

  7. 1 hour ago, hedgehog said:

    Wow, great story! Please keep us updated!

     

    If he was feeling like he was having trouble controlling himself and it's making him worried about being around you, it might be good to ease up on the cops a bit.

    I want to reduce cops next time. Go with social , or leather or something totally a mad mix. Let me figure out in due time.

     

     

    Quote

     

     

    My impression from what you're writing is that this guy is used to being logical and in control of his emotions, so feeling so completely out of control is scaring him.  But he can't resist! But he's terrified! But he can't stop thinking about you! And so on - he's in turmoil.

    I so feel for his turmoil and don't  know how i can help. :(

    Quote

     

    My impression of with guys like this is that their "armor" is their control over their  thoughts and emotions, but they're big softies in the inside. They're stoic and rational, and that's become a part of their identity. But you've somehow gotten past that and now he can't stop feeling these really strong emotions and he can't get you out of his mind. It's disquieting, like having a stranger popping up at the foot of your bed at 3 am in the morning.  And now that you have his heart, you could do a lot of damage, and he's scared.

    He said this that giving someone power over me is scary. It should not happen or only happen when you know the person really well over the years 

    This rational word is staple in every two sentence he speak and each one i speak :)

    So we both are overwhelmed with each other and so looking forward to forge this relationship. I am no less scared or unsure of things right now. I am willing to along whatever comes my way.

     

    Quote

     

    I agree with raydee - reassure him that you care about him, be warm, accepting, and basically help his logical side come around to where his emotions are. Once his rational side sees that you're a good partner for him, his internal conflict should ease and hopefully he can embrace the romance wholeheartedly. Good luck!

     

    Neither romance come easily to me nor emotions. I have my rational streak so dominant in me that i hardly connect with emotions. I am doing my efforts. 

     

     

  8. 4 hours ago, raydee8_love said:

     - my opinion is that for this type of man feeling out of control is way beyond what they are used to.  they the cappy alpha with leo moon is very serious and practical,  and the emotional stuff makes them uncomfortable - why would he like a woman he hardly knows?? Maybe he has not had any kind of feeling like he was experiencing  with you in a very long time. BUT at the same time their own feelings are strong  - and in their everyday life they control themselves and their environments - "contained' is a good descriptive word  I wonder if this man is private too-  not secretive just private.

    At different points in conversation  he mentioned me all this. i am so surprised you read him so well. And the part , like a women he hardly knows- is the best and the sigh when he said it. Lol. He is extremely private. Told me already. He said " Its not necessary that i will be blending with your pals in your life or family. I wont because i cant , I would just want my time with you and the things we will do together. I wont stop you doing whatever with them but i may not be part of it". I simply agree as i am fine with my own space beyond him and wouldn't want him around 24*7.

     

    4 hours ago, raydee8_love said:

    the texting - well when he's ready to text it's all go - but if he's busy it's almost like he never even heard of you - i find that confusing BUT i think a lot of men are the same way.... 

     He texted me yesterday- when i didnt reposnd to his morning message- Thinking of you in the midst of this busy office. 

    lol - he is making sure even he touch me somehow , when he refuse to communicate. Contradicting behavior but shows his tension.

    4 hours ago, raydee8_love said:

    be warm and kind, be open to finding out about him - what is he all about? Do you like what is all about in a few months when you know him better, will you still like him? and don't assume on his part - ask him for definitions 

    We do this- asd definitions and what we mean when we say something. he is the one to set the pattern and i followed. :)

     

    4 hours ago, raydee8_love said:

    go slow  one step at a time -   and stay on top of your own life, don't neglect yourself - got my fingers crossed for ya

    Relationship is organic and evolve with time. Though i am feeling things are bit fast, but if thats how they meant to be, i wont struggle, better let it be. 

     

    Thanks for you time to read and respond. It helps a lot. :)

  9. 6 hours ago, Snoopyace said:



    ""He likes you TOO MUCH.  He's not used to connecting with someone the way he has with you " 

    He confessed this word by word. 

     

    "because he likes you TOO MUCH.  He feels so intensely about how much he wants to be with you that he's afraid of "' - 

    How things will forward and what we will do? its to fast and i dont have much experience with you. I don't  like being out of control like this. Still i am liking every second of being with you and want more and more. 

     

    "he'll open up more to you (which he already has and for him that is NOT EASY to do!)" 

    He said its difficult for him to tell me all this but he want to be honest with me. 

     

    "'Hang in there, he really likes you and it is not JUST because of the copulin/phero cloud you bombed him with."'

    I somewhere feel same because of our month long conversations on phone prior to meeting.

     

     :Emoticons10311:

    Just my 2 cents.  

    "Not 2 cents , you were bang on . Keep helping me with your insights. I might post some questions or you soon. Thanks for stopping by, reading and helping here. :)

     

     

     

     

  10. OMG, Even i want to know more about this avoidance behavior thing you just mentioned. 

    The story goes like this- I made the report same day and posted it next day. Next day he talked on phone in morning. After that he vanished. I sensed that in his conversation that he is getting in pulling away mode. I didn't chase him entire day.  I sent a tiny good night message and no response. So i got busy in my life. he sent routine morning text to which i didn't reply and there he goes. In two hours he messages " Ok ,  You also decided not to reply" and till evening i couldn't reply. He finally broke the silence now and exchanged some messages and even called. He was sighing that i want you so much and since i met you i am reaching out to you in morning in half sleep and you are not here. 

    @Ray - I really want to know what's this vanishing and appearing?  He sure wants to take things forward and said so. At the same time saying i am not the guy to push you and hurt you in any way. He says he is struggling with that he wants me and disliking why he is wanting me so much. 

    I don't know if i did the right thing  :( I don't want to be the reason of his pain. Or is this guy tricking me somewhere? Should i go no cops and let it be on its own pace ?  I have some questions to answer.

  11. I wore – pure cops- 4 drops 2 in inner thighs and 2 behind knees dried for 20 mins and then covered with summer solstice 2009

    Cougar – 2 swipes wrist to elbow

    Anol (un) – 2 sprays to neck

    Bnol- 1 spray to left wrist

     

    I went out for the first meeting and met outside the restaurant. He just sat next to me and held my hand right away. We had a good conversation, with fun light moments of tickling and teasing. He began holding my waist while we walked in open market. After temperature rise, we moved to a mall where in we discussed some serious stuff. After coffee he started to hold me close to his body, while walking and kissed my head(many time). He kissed my forehead on almost every escalator we stood.

    If I appreciated anything while window shopping, he offered to buy it for me. I had to stop him all the time. He packed us dinner before finally leaving. The last hug felt very warm and the kiss on forehead with a smile was felt too good to me.

     

    Later he called from his car ride. He confessed that he had tough time to control himself from kissing me. He found very tough to keep his hands off me. He said he acted out of character and this is how he doesn’t behave with a lady. He said sorry and told me good that we were in public else he would have pushed me more.

    He called me this morning and said he is having tough time taking me off his mind. Quoting his words “I am imagining you while sleeping and when I wake up. I didn’t feel like this in years. If I would have been in hotel or private place, I would have pushed you for more. I want you so much that I am uncomfortable about myself and my behavior. I am not able to decipher its our chemistry or what”. I want you right by my side,  remember the hug and your fingers in my hand''. though I helped him to relax and asked him to give some more time to really get hold of his feelings. I knew what he felt but I had to say something. He wants to have more dates and said what if this chemistry thing happens again, he fears it.  

    I liked him too and know exactly what to wear next time, so his tension and feelings continue but I nudge him to think its love not lust. I am open to suggestions. He might want to visit again in a month or so. That’s what I presume, maybe sooner.

     

    Observation- he was not at all alpha in a bad way instead was protecting and was willing to provide.  This happened in 6 hours we spent together.did I overdo the cops dose? As I used mones after a big gap I lost my sweet spot and dosage plus pre-meno is also my concern. Open to thoughts and ideas.

     

  12. Hi, 

    We had a wonderful time. What this man felt and what he explained me over the phone afterwards and today morning can be a marathon report. I know inside my heart those are some of mones speaking, so valuable and worth sharing here. I so much want to write it all & post it here. I think a good idea is to start a journal as i foresee a relationship joiurney on my cards. Smiles:) 

  13. Hi, 

    I was a regular mone user and had great phero journey with some amazing results with my phero collection. Then life hit me hard. For some years struggling to put together everything in place in career work and relationship. I am an alpha in signature  and as people say with spine of steel, i refuse to give up. Its damn hard right now. I am putting effort to  work on all mentioned areas in life.

    While looking for the right man for me , recently came across someone online. After talking for couple of months, he suddenly told me he wants to meet and i agreed. so its tomorrow. He is travelling from another city to me. Which mone should i wear ? so, it leaves him in awe and wanting more and take the relationship forward.

    Something about him so it helps in suggestions - He is alpha (really alpha), with bossy streak in conversations. Do have lighter side and fun but always want to have the last word. At work he fly in skies - ( Hint -one of those most expensive combat birds) prepare and passes on the skills with no questions to his authorities. Have strange mix of such and alpha with high quality creative side. He is awesome at it. INTJ and Cappi with Leo moon. He mentioned in conversation - "wants an equal  in relationship not a baby girl to father".  Loves cuddling and misses it most in life. I hope this helps in suggesting the phero. Looking forward to some suggestions to make most out of this first date. I have almost everything from Mara which i saved for such coming times and not consumed it all. I can see what will work with him gradually on each coming date, but want to make just the right start. As i am off mones  for almost 2 years and Pre menopause, do not know what might work or backfire. So inviting suggestions if anyone can help me. 

     

     

  14. Magnanimity, I love your legs avatar! Beautiful!

     

    MrsC and Eggers, your posts seem to indicate new releases are announced around the 28th? Around the last Monday of the month? I've been gone so long I sadly no longer even know these fundamental principles *sigh*. Can someone please fill me in - in a Reader's Digest version kind of way - on "Things I Need to Know" LOL!

     

    QG and DD2.... I haven't even gotten through the last 3 years yet! Note to self: Never, ever deprive ones' self of LMPM goodies again! Dang good thing I had enough precious bottles to keep me, and those around me, well-scented and phero'd and bespelled during my hiatus....

     

    And you know what, I am loving your avi.... its inviting and mysterious.....

     

    Glad your back. though i am stalking all the time and reading posts sometimes, i don't post much. I myself don't know about the rules here, and after making few mistakes earlier, i am more scared to play here, but this is a lovely place and a paradise in itself.

     

    I hope any senior here answers your questions.

    NR's can come anytime, last week of current month or first weak of coming month, as far as i know. but its very interesting and exciting to be here and see the madness about LP's . I myself am enough mad to be called an LP addict and want more and more people to come along in this beautiful madness.

     

    Enjoy...

  15. Well, it's intro blend is called Fuzzy Wuzzy, so I'm going to guess that it's for snuggles & cuddles. Or warm fuzzies from the social stratosphere.

     

    Beccah, ur more experienced here, and probably your guesses could be more closer then mine.... i am trying to warm up the waiting time.... its killing... MARA , come out now..

     

    Its past midnight for me and see i sitting here for new pheros... I want themmm.. let the baby out now....

     

    you know beccah, how it is ? ....

  16. Wanna PLAy more Guyz....

     

    Gotcha should be for - expressing pleasure or being happy to understand . it should be a social blend making you expressive communicative and have pleasure, English is not my language but i am making all my possible guesses known to me :P

     

    Or

    Possibly it is something that makes you catch someone and be happy about it....

     

     

    Wot u say guyz ?

  17. Guyz i am late in posting it though, not so late as posting it before descriptions are up.....

     

    making a wild guess for LA FEMME NOIRE... it is something which is dark, black or maybe grey, which is not clearly expressed or not easy to understand.

     

    NOIRE is french word i guess which means Dark or obscure actually BLACK ... so this blend is dark mystery.... not just Like LFM

     

    wanted to post earlier but .... thought about LUNA and MARA.....ok

     

    Another guess for scent.....it is actually a red wine grape Mondeuse Noire, a red wine grape grown primarily in the Savoy region... so maybe the scent has something to do with this.... i have interest in wines so maybe this is interesting too.......

     

    yippie.... (only if i am right ) i think so :Emoticons0424:

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