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Weird question about womaniser best friends to boyfriends!


Frida's Lotus

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Hi all- first off, I just want to say how amazing all of your advice has been up to this point with my foray into pheros-- I've truly appreciated all the help and insight into the magic of these beautiful tools!

 

Well the saga continues-- I am meeting my now-boyfriend's best friend this weekend. This best friend to my boyfriend is a bit of a piece of work-- he only dates models-- has been trying to hook my boyfriend (before we were "exclusive") up with typically "hot" chicks (especially because I am not my BF's usual "type"). In a way this is a good thing as it made my BF realise he doesn't want to be with anyone else but me... BUT....

 

The best friend, let's call him Plonk, is highly judgmental of women on their looks. I'd like to cast a bit of a glamour over him when I meet him (he's potentially even coming to a performance I'm in) and have him intrigued, find me having a certain something, and not just straight away judging the fact that I'm not a model (and therefore not thinking I'm good enough for his best friend).

 

Now, I know the usual phero advice is that they can't make anyone feel anything, and I totally get that, so I'm not asking for miracles, but what would you ladies suggest in this situation, what pheros can sway this sort of response? What would you wear to help your lovely boyfriend's best friend give you a chance, help to find you attractive (cause you bloody well are), and not continue to try to hook up your BF with "hot chicks" he meets online?!

 

Thanks ladies and gents, any advice is HUGELY appreciated.

Edited by Frida's Lotus
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I have to second Halo. Maybe offer up a suggestion for Popularity Potion, because it sounds like you need to be hot in a hands off way with Plonk. Try some Star Power, baby! ;)

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Ditto EXACTLY what halo said. I would go with cougar- but this friend sounds like an ass. Hopefully whether it not bestie "approves", your bf will have good sense to go with his own feelings:)

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I kind of like the Popularity Potion or La Femme Mystere but that might be because I haven't seen much effect with Cougar, so far so I am biased. ;)

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Thanks all-- I don't care what he thinks at the end of the day, (and hopefully my BF doesn't either) but I've learned a lot lately about what men think about managing impressions and status and all that bullshit.

If he doesn't like me, screw him, but yes, it would make things easier if he did!

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I would go with SS4W or Popularity Potion.

 

For me, personally, when I wear Popularity Potion, I feel like I somehow wind up the center of attention or feel like the life of the party. It's entertaining and light and fun. But when I wear SS4W, I feel like Wonder Woman. I feel strong, sexy, centered, and all around dazzling. So Popularity Potion may make Plonk think, "hey, this girl's cool and fun to be around," but SS4W will make *you* think, "I don't give a shit what Plonk thinks, *I'm* amazing."

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I like Cougar for a good time, it makes me sparkle. To meet with such a ridiculous specimen of the human race, I would personally go with La Femme Mystere. Got a more regal feel to it, for me. A good rule to converse with that guy would be to be friendly enough, but to not show him too much attention. Make him feel, in a graceful way, that he is little more than nothing and you spend time with him as a courtesy to your boyfriend only. Hell, even talking to such a moron can be considered an insult to any woman's brain. Acknowledging that he exists is more than generous.

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Ok, so just going on a total guess here, but your bf's friend may be jealous of you and/or jealous of him for having a great gf. He could be jealous that you're 'taking away' his buddy - guys get weird like that. I agree with all others the the guy sounds like a d-bag and probably not worth your attention. hee

 

That said, totally understand what you mean, and love all the ideas but think I like LFM the best. Just knowing how it wears and comes across, I think it'll not challenge him and he'll have to treat you like a Queen. :) Or at the very least realize how awesome you are and for him to be more cool if he wants you to like him. :D

 

ETA: autocorrect spelling is not my friend. I should proof more prior to clicking on 'post'.

Edited by Beach Goddess
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See I think Cougar or maybe even Bang because she wants him to think she's hot. LFM has a more regal respect vibe to me. Not hot.

You're totally right. If she's going for smoking hot, I'd say Bang. Cougar is hot too, but also a bit more glam. For me, bang wears as more sexy hot. But agree LFM is a totally difft vibe, and regal might put him in awe. :) But you are spot on -i.e. depends on resulting vibe she wants for the situation.

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See I think Cougar or maybe even Bang because she wants him to think she's hot. LFM has a more regal respect vibe to me. Not hot.

 

 

I'd go with Cougar.

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Cougar and a couple sprays of Topper in your hair ^_^

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See I think Cougar or maybe even Bang because she wants him to think she's hot. LFM has a more regal respect vibe to me. Not hot.

I just have to chime in. ^^ This in response to your original question. For the reasons Halo spelled out. That's what I'd do.

On a slightly different take Pop esp with a glamour potion might dazzle him a bit, but he sounds like a strictly T&A kind of guy. soooo.

Oh yea an btw what a sad, Shallow Hal.

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I just have to chime in. ^^ This in response to your original question. For the reasons Halo spelled out. That's what I'd do.

On a slightly different take Pop esp with a glamour potion might dazzle him a bit, but he sounds like a strictly T&A kind of guy. soooo.

Oh yea an btw what a sad, Shallow Hal.

I suggested Pop because models are like "unattainable" hot, to me Pop is like hands off hot, & I think a man that strictly dates models will only be impressed with someone that he views as inaccessible to himself. LFM or SS4W might have the same vibe, I think Cougar is more of a sparkly, in your face, kind of hot. Or better yet. Just go with what normally works for you, if it aint broke....

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Warning: GUY'S POINT OF VIEW COMING!

 

Well wait a minute! Frida's Lotus has told us that his best friend "is a piece of work" and "only dates models" and "has been trying to hook my boyfriend (before we were "exclusive") up with typically "hot" chicks..."

 

She also said she will be MEETING HIM THIS WEEKEND. I presume this means she has not met him yet and this will be the first meeting.

 

A lot of critical (and not any positive) comments have been made about this guy that she hasn't even met yet. This guy could actually be an okay fella that happens to date models and/or very good looking women. What's wrong with him trying to hook up a single friend with the crowd he runs with? Remember, she said 'before we were exclusive.' I know a LOT of women who try to do that exact same thing. It doesn't automatically make him a bad or shallow dude because he dates beautiful women.

 

My brother is dating a girl with a very nice body. She has one of those faces where sometimes she looks pretty, sometimes yeesh! Hard to describe. Anyway, she's 18 yrs his jr and he is hanging onto this one. HOWEVER, her personality is of a bowl of cold plain oatmeal. I can't stand her. Our MOTHER can't stand her! Many reasons for this and my Brother knows them all. HE sticks with this Bitch, I'm guessing due to the looks. I would have dumped her ass long ago BECAUSE OF HER PERSONALITY!

 

We have a friend who recently married a girl with ever-so-slightly above avg looks. Closer to avg. But this girl is cool as fuck. And yes, THAT MATTERS. A LOT!

 

On the other hand, I usually only date what are considered attractive women as well. You approach what you are attracted to. You don't walk up to a stranger and start a conversation based on her personality. because you have not experienced that yet. But you do approach what you find physically attractive - and HOPE that the personality is there too!!!

 

I unfortunately do not know of any of the effects of the Female pheros. I wish I did! I wish I knew some women (good looking of course - sorry I had to) who wore them attempting to get me to rip their clothes off (as some of you post). I only chimed in because I wanted to throw a different perspective into the mix.

 

And for the record - my Mother would tell you that I am a GREAT guy...Hahah!

Edited by HappyGoSkillfully
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Ya I get what your saying and he could be a cool guy. But she also said he was "highly judgmental" about women and their looks... Which I think is different than wanting to date attractive people. Shit, I like attractive people but I'm not judgmental if you're not up to standard lol. I have a ton a guy friends and three brothers- I get it. And everyone's different. looks matter but don't be stuck up about it;)

As far as phero I still think id go with cougar. It dazzles people and is sexy ;)

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@HappyGoSkillfully I wasn't making judgements on someone that I don't know. I was just trying to help a sistah out. I know what it's like to deal with superficial, judgemental, people because at 5 ft tall I somehow attract giants (well to me, anyway) & have received a lot of "short woman stealing the tall guy" hate, lol. Or judgement from the men that only date model, i.e. tall women, types. But yes, I guess it's easy to misinterpret & not understand where people are coming from over the internet, when you can't hear people's voices or actually know them, to know where the advice comes from.

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Just came back to this since my original comment. I understand what HappyGoSkillfully is saying and friends hook up friends all the time and just about every female here has swooned over some of the male models Mara has used and at least one person here has admitted they have a weakness for male "eye candy" but I think the impression of judgmental about looks is the key difference here as has been pointed out. It's one thing to notice an attractive member of the opposite sex as well as realizing you are attracted to, say, tall blonds or whatever. Being judgmental about looks is something different though.

 

@Beccah: Darlin' - at 5 ft tall, half of the male population (5'10" & above) is approaching giant unless you are wearing your big heels haha! :lol:

 

I hope it went well!

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  • 4 weeks later...

Hi all, sorry its taken me so long to reply-- I'm just coming up for air now.

 

It actually went really well. I took the majority-rules advice on here and wore Cougar. The friend was awesome to me all night, and told me he thought I looked great and he told me that he told my BF not to "screw it up" (although my BF swears that he never said that to him?!)

At the end of the night he gave me a huge hug-- so I think I have his approval.

My BF reacted really well to Cougar as well (he reacts beautifully to Gotcha, but not so much to LACE or PM).

 

Weirdly though, my band (all men) were all irritable and touchy all night (with the exception of my bassist who was weirdly flirty) -- the guitarist was actually a bit agro and rude with me-- so strange.

Ah men, lovely but downright confusing at the best of times!

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@Beccah: Darlin' - at 5 ft tall, half of the male population (5'10" & above) is approaching giant unless you are wearing your big heels haha! :lol:

 

 

Just saw this, yes, yes they are! My son & his friends started passing me up in the height department around middle school, haha.

 

Glad Cougar worked out for you. Interesting about your band mates reaction. I've really only ever had one negative reaction from Cougar & it was from another woman that was being horribly taunted by her (then) husband.

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Hi all, sorry its taken me so long to reply-- I'm just coming up for air now.

 

It actually went really well. I took the majority-rules advice on here and wore Cougar. The friend was awesome to me all night, and told me he thought I looked great and he told me that he told my BF not to "screw it up" (although my BF swears that he never said that to him?!)

At the end of the night he gave me a huge hug-- so I think I have his approval.

My BF reacted really well to Cougar as well (he reacts beautifully to Gotcha, but not so much to LACE or PM).

 

Weirdly though, my band (all men) were all irritable and touchy all night (with the exception of my bassist who was weirdly flirty) -- the guitarist was actually a bit agro and rude with me-- so strange.

Ah men, lovely but downright confusing at the best of times!

I'm glad all went well with the BF & friend. A weird thing with the band tho.. maybe something else was up or maybe they were just responding to you flashing a different phero signature?? ah well one thing at a time.

Just my unsolicited 2c, I would not trust a thing out of that dudes mouth (the friend that is). My BS-dar is flashing . He's a schmoozer and that's fine and dandy to get along with in a casual friendly setting but don't trust him... he will probably make lots of comments to get you to " open up" dont you believe a bit of it. Just a warning from someone who's been there. Be in charge of what you say. He actually sounds pretty needy to me and I like how he assumes his blessing is so totally critical not just to your BF but to you as well.

But whatever there are worse people you could be dealing with. If you can use this experience as a way to gain knowledge and a savvy new social skill go for it.

Also, he's NOT the end all be all of your relationship. You and the BF are in charge of that.

 

I would really be courious to see you hit the band guys with some Audacious one day.

Edited by StacyK
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