Kid of the male persuasion and ADHD?

[imagining_that]

He'll be 12 quite soon. He'll be 'officially' diagnosed with ADHD tomorrow. Brilliant child, can't sit still and focus. Loves scent. I'm wondering...could a phero help this amazing critter? I have a trial or two of Focus Potion (but I don't know if he'll like the scent...I don't...). Has anyone ever shared their pheros with kids and if so, to what end? If so, any other ideas of what could help him 'remember to turn in homework', 'stay seated in class', 'refrain from yelling out funny things and getting peers off-task', etc?

[Raq On]

I don't know.... I do have an unscented vial of Mother's Little Helper that I have worn on myself when around my own kids. I think we should be careful when dealing with kids, since they are still developing, (brains, bodies, etc.) I have a son around that age and he sort of "wanders off" mentally in school. I think to some degree most boys do. If it's any consolation, I have learned that our kids' brains don't fully devolop until late teens even early 20's. (The section for judgement develops last), which is no comfort when you have teen agers.

 

Maybe Mara can weigh in on this.

[quietguy]

I have heard of a couple things that help adults with concentration, focus, drive but I am with Raq - I may have on pheros around my kids from time to time BUT I would not put pheros on my kids. They are still developing. Me, I am a lost cause ... lol.

[luna65]

Yeah I'd have to agree, I don't wear pheros around my son nor would I let him use them; of course when he's of age he can do what he likes.

[LadyVictoria]

I have that problem at work, and always had that problem at school as well. I was never diagnosed with anything and was actually labeled gifted at a young age, but my parents didn't want me to be labeled something at such an early age, so they enrolled me in catholic school so I could be labeled the devil instead.

 

One thing that I've found has worked for me~ whenever I sit in a class or any sort of training, is I sit in the back, it helps me focus, I know it sounds weird but in school I always sat in the back ~ and in any kind of training, meetings, etc, I always sit in the back, this way I don't have energy or curiosity of what is going on behind me if I sit in the front. It's way too distracting if I sit in the front, I get nervous and can't focus and blurt out things. If I sit in the back, I feel like I have control of the place and can prevent anyone from trying to sneak up on me and choke me.

 

Maybe your child is sensitive to energy and would focus better if he sat in the back of class? Sometimes I think their bodies are going to fast for their brains and they need to catch up, my nephew is going to be 8, super smart, but when he was younger he was all over the place and unfocused, brilliant but unfocused. I suggested maybe getting him into activities that wore him out- so my brother enrolled him in every after school sport he could find and that helps him concentrate because his body is on the same speed as his brain now.- and he excels at sports. He is in baseball, football etc. My niece is going through this now, she is 4 and all over the place.. I am suggesting dance for her because she loves trance music and does the robot so well... I have a weird family and the offspring are all strange birds including my son who doesn't say much but he's almost 2, says dada, mama, and booty, because yes I taught him how to shake and slap his booty. Maybe you shouldn't take my advice.

 

Which reminds me, I want to try focus so I have to dig out my aether sample..sorry for the thread jackorama!

[skye]

I've used Focus Potion on my son but he's 15. He actually keeps the vial in his backpack and uses a little before tests.

[halo0073]

I have ADHD. What type is he diagnosed with? Sounds like hyperactive type to me. I am inattentive. I am with the other ladies, i would avoid pheros for him at that age. I do wear pheros around my kids, but I took over 2 years and started very very slowly until i was positive they weren't acting any differently when I did. I will burn a B2 or G2 tart around them from time to time. And I let my step-daughter (almost 15) put on a dab of B2 once when she was PMSing really badly. It seems like most of the time i hear about a kid reacting badly to their parent's phero use it is a boy. No clue if that's true or just those that have been reported.

[imagining_that]

Thanks all for the input! Doc says he's a mix of hyperactive and inattentive...and prescribed meds as a trial. We'll see. I just really want him to feel 'normal' and be successful.

 

@ Lady Victoria--he's also been labeled 'gifted' and is in the program...always the smartest kid, just can't get his whole act in line with what the school needs, unfortunately. He's done front of class, back of class, alone, in a group, off to the side...it doesn't seem to matter. He can't seem to help himself from wiggling or talking or as one teacher said 'leaving his seat inappropriately and even giving in to 'doing a little jig'. So...that's why I thought, hmmm...maybe a little focus-by-potion might be of assistance.

 

So I'm curious...application of pheros to a developing somebody can change up their chemical make-up? I wear pheros daily, kids or no kids around, and to my knowledge, they've encountered no ill effects. However, I'm still new to the chemistry/phero world, and ever-so curious. Please do comment and share your wealth of collective knowledge!

[luna65]

Not that drastic, I wouldn't think. But wearing a phero blend is a different thing than responding to it on someone else. I just believe that given the stew of hormones which kids already are, it's not necessarily a good idea to throw something else into the mix in terms of direct use. But that's just me, it's up to everyone to decide for themselves. I would think pursuing some kind of holistic option might be a better road to consider first.

[imagining_that]

Thanks Luna! And that's why I'm here...I'm so amazed at the amount of phero knowledge here...I keep thinking to myself "How am I ever going to get it all straight? I can't afford to keep buying and trying..." I think perhaps I'll have to start up a spreadsheet or database...Off-topic from the kid subject...but I start free-associating and well...I'm just like that

 

I'm about to continue on in that vein, but it's so off-topic that I suppose it would be better to start a different thread...in the event that it's relevant to anyone else out there!

[ElizabethOSP]

Hi, imagining_that! Have you tried essential oils for your son? My family uses therapeutic EOs for *everything,* and I keep noticing mention of ADHD in descriptions of some of the oils. Chamomile and Lemon are two that I found on a quick search of Ananda Apothecary's site.

 

My son is an Asperger's dude, and there's a bit of the hyperactivity in him, too. I teach music and art--some one-on-one, some classroom--and every ADD or ADHD or autistism spectrum kid I've ever met was brilliant. They all just floor me. Smart, creative, funny people. And once they get their mental tools together to manage themselves...look out, world!!! I LOVE working with these kids. It's been long enough that I've watched one grow up and go to college and he's one of the most incredible musicians I know. I've come to look at these "disorders" as gifts. I'll bet your son is an absolute gem!

 

Jumping back to the pheros, I too use pheros around my kids. They're almost-18 (son), 15, and 9. I wear pheros, and I use them in the wax melts that Mara makes. I'll phero-bomb the kiddos if they get too much cabin fever and just need to chill. We live in a teeny town in the mountains, and we homeschool, so sometimes they just need *something*...!

 

At Christmas time a year ago, my Mom-in-law was declining and then passed away right before Christmas. My older daughter (who was 14 then) and I would both wear May Day with Tranquility potion on visits, and it seemed to help the whole family. No noticed ill effects on my daughter. But other than that, it's just been non-pheroed scents for the kids.

Edited January 27, 2012 by ElizabethOSP

[imagining_that]

Great ideas...the EOs and the melts! He's so in tune with scent...a friend was once going to teach him to distill fragrance because she recognized something in his 'nose' and thought that he'd do really well, but she had to move away suddenly and that, sadly, was that.

 

BUT...he has a warmer in his room and loves to experiment with different scents in his living space. I've noticed that he'll first smell anything new (food, drink, paper...). One year we were trying to come up with games for his younger sister's birthday party and he came up with, well, I don't know what you'd call it. He wanted to put different smelling things in covered containers and make everyone smell-then-guess what they were. I need to check out any sort of happy/focus/feel-good vibe melts for home. And actually, I was thinking about the fact that our wood-stove fireplace insert could do a nice job of melting up some wondrous scents in a ceramic bowl...hmmm...

 

Thanks for that!!

[ElizabethOSP]

You heat with a woodstove too? So do we. I love woodstoves! Ours is in the middle of our somewhat-open-plan house (read: randomly built-out cabin. Heh). Be careful with the wax melts on your woodstove, though. Ours gets hot enough that I wouldn't do the melts on it...but then, we even cook on the thing sometimes, so you see the kind of heat we use. I *do* put essential oils once in a while in the water pot we keep on our stove. Do you keep a water pot on yours? I've thought of throwing a wax melt into the water, but since I often forget to refill the pot, I figured it was better to NOT burn my house down.

[imagining_that]

Our 'primary' heat source is a diesel burner (house built in 1950), but I really try to 'supplement-mostly' with the wood stove and not use the diesel heater unless absolutely necessary. It's noisy and dirty and...well, probably toxic. I suppose the wood-smoke is too at some level, but having the fire in the family room tends to draw us all together (myself, the 2 kids and the 2 dingos...we're all fire-babies). There's a calming influence and I'm learning to welcome winter :-) The changing of the daylight hours has produced a profound effect on this family. Where we were flying about under the aegis of the sun before winter struck; through the house, the yard, the universe; familial bits approaching a state of maximum entropy, order has been somehow restored. Now it's dark. And cold. And a gorgeous fire in the stove seems to re-align and restructure us, reigning us in quietly with a common focus. Winter hurts, but it also filters out the peripheral input and provides a blanket of contentment. Add to them some co-mingling of earthy scents, it can't help but provide a cozy haven for us all. My fire-box is large and the insert is inefficient, so I think I could get away with an earthen bowl with melts. But I've also wondered about the oil in the water pot too. I believe I shall experiment!

[ElizabethOSP]

Dude. You use the language poetically. Are you a writer? I love how you describe the seasonal change. You said it perfectly. We're in the mountains in southern California, and although the rest of the southland doesn't get drastic seasons, we do. Our canyon is deep and we live against the toes of the southern ridge. At winter solstice, the sun crests the eastern ridges at about 8am and sets behind our ridge at 2pm. We've been feeling lucky to have sunlight 'til 2:30 these days. It seems...right...to feel the changes of the seasons. Satisfying. Since I grew up down in the valley, it delights me to watch my kids respond as nature shifts. We've got 3 kitties and a sorta-german-shepherd, and *they* all shift, too...but then, you know that! You have DINGOS? I knew one years ago--he was an extremely clever canine. Scary smart.

 

Oh-oh-oh! I forgot to tell you. The wax melt pheros I use in the house are Alpha-androstenol, Teddy BB, G2, Open Windows, and Lace. Once I stuck one in the warmer, not particularly noticing which scent it was. It had Open Windows in it. After a while, all three kids were sitting on the living room floor in deep conversation, having a great old time and totally neglecting the schoolwork. I thought, "How the hell did they end up down there?" Then I realized I'd thoroughly pheroed them. Heeee!

 

P.S. Your boy sounds like a natural perfumer!!! Checking things out by scent first is fascinating. The fact that he uses scents for his own living space blows me away in one so young.

Edited January 27, 2012 by ElizabethOSP

[imagining_that]

Thank you. I write...but I don't know that I'd qualify that further by labeling myself a writer. I've been hired to do technical writing for my friend (a dentist. I simply can't get excited about learning much about the dental sciences and translating to the lay person in a 'spicy, yet informative' couple of paragraphs. He's also hired me to edit his book about his humanitarian work overseas, but I've yet to see anything concrete come out of that). My friends have asked many times that I write a book of my travels (I used to live in West Africa, have crossed the Sahara overland to Timbuktu...which I DID write about...and a couple of other things that apparently capture attention), but writing on FB or in posts or emails is my expression of the myriad thoughts desirous of an outing from my cranium via my digits, committing to actual writing fetters me as it's no longer a release valve, instead transforming into an iron maiden of sorts. I just like to play with words. And take liberties. And have fun with it all. :-) Plus, I type at the speed of light.

 

Ah, the dingos. Well...they're strange and wonderful African souls. Basenjis, the African dingo. Although they are kept as domesticated pets and classified as dogs by the AKC, they are still wild things. Genetically, they are not truly related to domestic canids so much as they are to the jackal or dingo. They 'decided' through the last couple of thousands of years spent living aside humans to adopt us into THEIR plan. Both of mine are rescues, from homes that realized that it's not so easy to bring a wild beastie into one's home and expect it to behave according to plan. They ARE crazy smart. Scary smart. And wickedly dangerous when they desire to be. They've evolved as large-game hunters on the African plains. They do not bark (but can be vocal), do not shed, have no smell and come equipped with the ability to climb anything, including trees (thank goodness nobody has informed my own that the same skill that allows them to climb about the furniture like cats is the same that could be used to climb the foliage near the fenceline to escape.). Where my son is the scent-master, my 10-year old daughter is the animal whisperer, and has been an enormous asset while assimilating these two into our family.

 

Your home sounds wonderful! And yes, the seasonal change IS satisfying. AND exciting, as the moment of realization hits that the next is upon us! I grew up on the east coast, where there were 4 distinct seasons. Then moved to West Africa, where there was only Dry season, Lesser Rainy Season, Greater Rainy Season and a moment known as Harmattan where the winds sweeping down across the Sahara would fill the air with silt and sand from the desert and block out the viciousness of the sun. Here in the Sierra Nevada foothills, we do have seasons, but some (most notably spring) are often so short, and come so unexpedtedly, that if we don't celebrate them in the moment, we find ourselves foisted into the next.

 

But back to pheros and scents :-) I will buy some of the melts and experiment...it's interesting to me that diffusion can happen without the human chemistry component that I'd thought integral to all pheros (again...new to this all!!) ~~sigh~~wish I had unlimited funds to purchase a full arsenal and experiment madly!!

[halo0073]

You will love the tarts. You do have a magical way with words.