Any other negative male reactions to Est.?

[Dolly]

I HATE nesty males. Mr. Shelly is one - and one that is NOT handy around the house - and I married him anyway... EGAD - batcrap crazy indeed.

 

:-)

 

 

Mine is somewhat "nesty", but he is damn handy.....fixes all kinds of crap that gets broken.....loves doing home improvement projects, cooks, cleans, does laundry, takes care of kids, the whole shooting match.....he even manages to take care of yard work too.....damn handy to have around!!

[Guest Lor]

I was going off personality types of men I had dated and the ones I always meshed with best vs. the ones I didn't. And the ones I didn't always brought out my dominant edge. Now it could also be that it was astrologically based because there is some evidence there, but there was also that alpha male vs. not alpha male. I always felt that the not alpha males brought out the best in me, the most feminine, relaxed, comfortable and content me that I could be. The alpha males? I was like Xena the warrior bitch with them. All fight and struggle and aiming right for my insecurities, playing them like a piano.

 

So now I just need to figure out if alpha males are est men or if one doesn't even correlate with another. Dang it, I need SUBJECTS and QUESTIONNAIRES. LOLOLOL

 

 

oooh can alpha males also be Est-men..... great topic for a talk show!

I would also like to know.

[Guest Lor]

Mine is somewhat "nesty", but he is damn handy.....fixes all kinds of crap that gets broken.....loves doing home improvement projects, cooks, cleans, does laundry, takes care of kids, the whole shooting match.....he even manages to take care of yard work too.....damn handy to have around!!

 

 

uhh.... can we clone him?

[Dolly]

uhh.... can we clone him?

 

 

That's what everybody asks.....thinking about renting him out to make some extra money!

[starlitegirl]

oooh can alpha males also be Est-men..... great topic for a talk show!

I would also like to know.

 

This is what's really got me curious too. I'm sort of making an assumption based on experiences. Alpha males that I've dealt with did not like me dominant. They only preferred me when I was submissive. It probably is the Clash of the Titans that Dolly mentioned. Two alphas just keep coming up against each other. No yin yang factor. But for some reason, though I can be either Dominant or Submissive the Alphas very often bring out my dominant, which I think has more to do with abuse of power than anything else.

 

When I've been around Alphas that were fair and even keeled, I was perfectly content to be submissive. I'm not even sure if I'm using submissive appropriately here. So for clarity, I'll add that by submissive I mean being comfortable with not being in charge or taking control and letting others make decisions and choices. Alphas that make bad decisions and choices, especially ones that effect my well-being cause me to become an alpha, but it doesn't always happen right away. I tend to let things slide because everyone has off days.

 

Of course, now I'm wondering where I am normally between on the dominant/submissive scale, and I suspect that might explain a lot in my dating life. *scratches head*

[Guest Lor]

My experiences pretty much mimic what you have recently stated,Starlitegirl.

 

I think everyone might have the abilities within to take an alpha or beta stance depending on who they are with in the moment, and what is more comfortable.

 

I can take a back-seat anytime of the day to another person with a good head on their shoulders and good intentions.

Strangers, not as quickly.

 

I think there are 3 different kinds of people,and none of them better/worse than the other.

The positives:

 

you have your passive/beta/peacemakers and all-around laid-back partners-in-crime;

glad to give over control or decision making.

 

you have your aggressive/alpha/natural leader and all-around fun-instigators;

that love to have control or make decisions.

 

and then you have your empaths.

people who can easily become one or the other depending on how their partner in the moment is behaving/feeling.

They can take the leadership role without hesitation but in the next moment turn over complete control to someone they feel has a better grip for the wheel.

They can morph easily into whatever is needed at the time.

 

maybe we are empaths?

[starlitegirl]

and then you have your empaths.

people who can easily become one or the other depending on how their partner in the moment is behaving/feeling.

They can take the leadership role without hesitation but in the next moment turn over complete control to someone they feel has a better grip for the wheel.

They can morph easily into whatever is needed at the time.

 

maybe we are empaths?

 

Oh I love this and there do seem to be all three types. I've met all of them. I think empaths would be where we are if we can readily switch. What I've noticed personally is that since I started wearing pheromones last year, I've been able to figure out who prefers what based on responses. When I wear any dominant blend there are certain men that literally stand at attention and smile at me when I walk by. They are most always ones that strike me as more laid back and shy. When I don't wear pheros or wear a blend that is more est based, the response is meh. Of course, I only figured this all out since we started discussing it in this thread. Until then it was only observations of responses that I didn't fully comprehend.

 

Now I feel like I have to pick a team (Team Alpha or Team EST) and stay on it or at least stay on it when I'm dealing with certain people otherwise I will come across as nebulous at best, which again explains quite a lot.

Edited January 15, 2010 by starlitegirl

[luna65]

When I've been around Alphas that were fair and even keeled, I was perfectly content to be submissive.

 

That's really the key, I think. I wouldn't define Quince as a typical alpha male, but he does radiate a quiet authority. The nature of our two personalities and how they best interact means that we prefer to embody those classic roles of dominant Scorpio/submissive Pisces. He's decisive, the nature of his work means he has to be organized and responsible, and he's considered an authority (one of his colleagues refers to him as Yoda, heh) but he's not overly aggressive or assertive. As I've mentioned before he's actually rather reserved and even shy on occasion. My stance has always been that I will be submissive to the person who has earned my respect, who inspires me to give them everything I have. But otherwise I will not show my true nature, and that's really an example of how we all gauge our reactions in terms of the other. We are only authentic with those we trust implicitly.