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Special Delivery Rebrew?


Potion Master
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Guess who got out of a ticket the other day? ME! What was I wearing Special Delivery!

My sister was shitting big bricks and started sweating. I told her to sit still- it wasn't like we were crossing the border with kilos or coke or anything. She kept saying she was going to throw up. I was like . OMG relax- let me handle this and just shush!

 

I wasn't doing anything wrong , I always follow the law. My brother is in law enforcement so I kinda have to, not that I wouldn't or anything, and technically I am considered a lethal weapon so I can't fight or I will go to jail for sure. Plus I will lose my licenses and job. I have a license to kill. J/k. I'm a good girl- well there was that one time I went to jail but I was 13.. and I swear there is nothing like doing cold hard time that will straighten a girl right up. Anyhow cop pulls me over and Suzy Q is in a frenzy- the girl always gets tickets, for everything. Me - I do get pulled over but because I am so charming and I have big eyes that if you stare in them it's like the twilight zone- they usually just tell me to have a good day and walk back to their cars like zombies.

 

Cop flashes lights and I pull over and cut the engine. I size up my victim, SHIT he is not fuckin around, a tiny flutter of panic goes through my chest. The guy looks like he was in prison and his skill was killing people with his toes, he has tattoos, ray bans and looks like an extra from " American Me. " Shit. He is going to hate me. He walks over and asks me for my info. As I was pulling out my wallet I placed my brothers card on top kinda hiding, kinda in view, knowing that the cop is looking at everything I am doing all my movements, my sister's movements, letting him think that I might pull it out at one point but giving him the option to not let this little situtation of ours get that far.

 

"Miss, your tags are expired" he says.. "Why?" "Why aren't you in the DMV database?"

I gasp! "What? That can't be sir! I have my tags right here! In my glove compartment. I know, I know they should be on my license plate but I just haven't had time sir. I promise I will do that today, I haven't put them on because I am completely paranoid, as you can see my spare tire is missing, I am afraid that next time someone will steal my tags"

 

No I am not really afraid of that, I am just really lazy and procrastinate, I have been driving around for 8 months with no tags. I have them , I just can't bother myself to put them on and I keep forgetting to ask the bf to do it.

 

" Oh I am so sorry to hear about your spare tire Miss, okay I understand now, just get those tags on. Will your insurance be covering your spare? Everything okay on that end, it smells so nice in your car is that your air freshner?"

 

Finally after talking for about twenty minutes or so.. we bid adieu. Suzy Q was staring at me with her mouth open.

 

Special Delivery did it again. This cop was going to give me a ticket, had I not talked his ear off and let him get a whiff - I would've had a fix it ticket- had to gone down to the courthouse.. ugh.

 

LOVE SPECIAL DELIVERY ~ it made me think fast- act fast -and it brought me luck!!

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I'm sure you've heard the joke about how women are really dressing/wearing makeup for each other - men don't give a shit. Well I think it's the same with most florals : men don't care - they may not dislike it, but they don't care - the way they do about foody scents. At least the ones I've met, LOL. ETA there are exceptions of course, like some violets which seem to hit some of them pretty hard.

Edited by tyvey
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I'm sure you've heard the joke about how women are really dressing/wearing makeup for each other - men don't give a shit. Well I think it's the same with most florals : men don't care - they may not dislike it, but they don't care - the way they do about foody scents. At least the ones I've met, LOL. ETA there are exceptions of course, like some violets which seem to hit some of them pretty hard.

 

 

I have heard that, and you are right. Anytime I wear any of the foody scents like Compromising Positions, Castle Crumble, Nookie ~ he always says I smell sooo good.

Then I wear the exotic sandalwood, resins, ashes, tobacco, peace pipe, mystery, whodunnit scents and he says I smell like herbs. Jasmine is his weak spot, he loves Jasmine. I was thinking of a foody Jasmine... have you ordered your Mango one?

I ordered your Cupcake and I cannot wait!!

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Well I think it's the same with most florals : men don't care - they may not dislike it, but they don't care - the way they do about foody scents.

 

This is Quince to a T - just about anytime I wear something floral he makes The Face, unless it's a gourmand floral which is heavy on the former rather than the latter. He seemed to like Love Blossom well enough and I think it was the sugar aspect of it he was reacting to. But if I want his full attention I must smell like cake. :)

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