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BelleDuJour

Recommendations Welcomed [& Needed :)]

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I shared my new phero findings w/ a very dear friend. Her situation is an interesting one. She was in a relationship w/ another women for 5 years. They're both exclusively attracted to men. Neither are attracted to women - so, they're an anomaly for each another. It was very much a soul-matey relationship/connection.

 

She's been in a very soft spot post-split (10 months ago). Completely out of her element. To be frank, she's been a complete wreck. They're going to be seeing each other in a few weeks and her anxiety right now is that she doesn't want to be an emotional mess in front of her. She knows she'll breakdown a bit but she doesn't want it to be ugly. In researching what to purchase for her, I did ask her what she hoped to achieve from their meet-up, she says she wants to feel in control of her emotions, to feel like she has a handle on them, and for a respectful, open (lowered defenses), honest and connected meeting. She wants to reconcile hence the 'connected' bit.

 

I'm in a conundrum with what to get for her given all of the above and being an unseasoned user. What do you recommend? Suggest? I greatly appreciate your perspective as I don't want to steer her wrong. Also, I did inform her that pheros don't do all the work & aren't magic. So, she is aware.

 

Thank you. :)

Edited by BelleDuJour

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She wants to get back together? I have no idea... Interested in hearing what others suggest. If I were in the situation, I would go with Balm Balm or Perfect Match. Or even some Harmonious Self spell oil.

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I would go with something like Girl/Girl, Treasured Hearts or even Open Windows.

Edited by Dolly

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I wish I had a great suggestion, I think others have it pretty much covered.

 

Also from spell oils - maybe Love Thyself (it's calming and centering, like Harmonious Self but of course different), or One True Love (which also has a self love vibe to it). (?)

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I'd go with Harmonious Self. Let's her stay grounded and move from the heart AND mind, without having to potentially battle a pheromone signature that is working against the moment.

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Many useful suggestions above. As I'm not sure how they split this might not be appropriate but there is also the Quarrel Mender spell oil. They may not have had a fight per se but as they split it does seem to me that they're at odds. Anyway, the magical associations of the notes seem relevant to your friend's situation. Have a look and see if you agree.

 

I suppose even if they can't make this work as a romantic relationship QM might help them part on terms of a continuing friendship.

Edited by donsie

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I know Dom Noire lifted me up and got me back in control after being a lil' down and weepy yesterday. I'm not sure how fitting it would be for her particular situation... but for me the effects are great.

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Thank you all so much, you guys! :)

 

She does want to get back together but she's aware of the possibility that they may not. We were just discussing this last night. She doesn't have her hopes set on it (which I was concerned about). So at least she's being realistic.

 

I originally thought G2, G/G, or Perfect Match (connected, new love feeling). Then I thought maybe LFM (for the respect). I stayed away from Treasured Hearts, Heart and Soul, etc., because she's been so emotional that I thought it would be best to stay away from blends that may trigger that. She's a top-of-her-game, confident, bubbly, and pulled-together woman, not the emotional type at all. Strong, rock-like figure for people around her. She expressed that her emotions over this - the way she's been - freaked her out a bit. Didn't want those blends to possibly bring out something she wanted to keep at bay (Was my thinking). Hmm.. I'm thinking Perfect Match. G2 and G/G - has anyone used these in same-sex relationships? I remember there wasn't much info on that in their threads as majority of the experiences were straight usage (for lack of better term).

 

You know, my mind completely didn't go into the spell direction. I'm a complete foreigner to that world and practice & haven't experimented with them myself so I didn't really think to consider them for her. But, I will absolutely throw that out there to her and see if she's open to them and her internal comfort level with using them since they're different than pheros.

 

PS. Going to hijack my own thread here for my own knowledge. I remember reading about someone pairing a glamour potion w/ Cougar and the result being positive. When it comes to spell potions and phero blends that are complimentary and more linear in their intents -- like GlamourPotion/Cougar, Liquid Mercury/True Confessions, Serenity Potion/Balm Bomb, One True Love/Perfect Match, etc -- what's the general consensus on that? Wonder if I should start a thread about this. People can share their experiences & opinions.

Edited by BelleDuJour

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Hi Belle, when Mara came out with the new spell collection she said though we of course could boost with a phero, it wasn't her recommend.

 

Of course you could probably pair whatever you want and some of the combos you've mentioned may be good. I just haven't paired any from that collection with a phero because didn't feel the need and also because of what Mara had mentioned. There's really so much positive energy in them (the ones I've tried), they are awesome solo.

 

Why don't you try some samples and see how they feel to you - or your friend if she wants to try them out? Then you can decide if you want to pair with phero or wear solo, or how they feel to you. I had so many happy surprises from that collection where the fragrance is so gorgeous and uplifting (hence I haven't worn with phero yet). Especially the ones others have mentioned here.

 

Star Power is already boosted with pop potion for an extra oomph. Love that one too! But I don't think that's what she's looking for here.

 

FYI - all have given great advice, but I have a feeling Donsie has a super knack for it. She's given so much smart advice on other threads. I've asked her to start an 'advice' thread - hoping she will! :)

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Thank you for your input BG! :) The latter part of my post in regards to spell/phero blend was totally for me and my own knowledge. Not pertaining to my friend, nor would I feel comfortable suggesting combining the two not knowing how something like that works myself. Sorry for the confusion! Totally my fault! I think I will remove that bit and start a new thread about it. But, thank you for your info on that. Insightful & good to know! :) & Yes, I've been noticing that about Donsie's posts. ;)

 

I am lending my friend my Perfect Match to play around with (in these weeks leading up to) and my Topper to kind of buffer it (the mushies) if she feels necessary. I'm also going to purchase Girl/Girl for her. I read that G/G was going to replace G2, so I guess they are about the same give or take? And she can figure out from there what makes her feel best for the sitch by experimenting with the two beforehand. I figured she could use it post-meet up @ her workplace & I know she could really benefit from it there as well. She works for a major fashion publication and although she is a higher up, the competitiveness in the industry is very unbecoming. I'm really excited to see how G/G will work in that aspect w/her usage. So... PM or G/G... *Dun dun*....

 

I'll report back on what she decides and how it went. :)

Edited by BelleDuJour

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I'd get her "Love Is Love" (boosted with Girl/Girl). Mara's enhanced scents really do work "magic". IMO she'll more likely find her sweet spot faster than with the Un phero. If it helps with this current person, great! If Not, she may find it useful when she starts dating again.

Edited by StacyK

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Thanks StacyK! "Love is Love" is actually what I'll be getting her. :) She isn't actually attracted or interested in women w/her ex being the exception. BUT.. Who knows how G/G will work in the dating realm if she wears it out and about, right? :) Interesting to learn and observe for sure!

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Oh yes, you said that this relationship was the anomaly for both women. Well I'd say LIL is still the best choice. Outside of a relationship, it's also a great BFF scent. It's good in some work scenarios too.Always good for a "girls night out" no matter what.

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